PEOPLE ARE LONELY BECAUSE THEY BUILD WALLS INSTEAD OF BRIDGES.

Sunday 28 December, 2008

Dream dream dream...

Dreams… Ambitions… Goals… How important are these in one’s life? When I delve into my childhood, I am unable to recount if I ever had a dream – either to become Ms. Universe, or the most famous business woman, or to have a huge doll house all to myself, or to live in the clouds, or to walk on the moon! I was [still am!] a happy child, content with life, doing things I enjoyed and doing them with earnestness and to the best of my ability.


Would my life be different if I had a cherished dream? Would I have chosen a different path? Would I be more focused and driven? Well… May or may not be! I would really never know how life would be in a tangential continuum! I can only talk about life right here, right now. I believe in destiny. What will be – will be! Every person follows a different path to fulfill his/her destiny. I live one day at a time and embrace what life throws at me. There are some who defy life and challenge their destiny to follow their dreams. Do they manage to break free from the vicious circle… Or is it a futile exercise? Each to his own!


I believe that all paths lead to the same result. Trails are subject to choice, the outcome is not. So… Do I lack ambition, a purpose in life? It has been a long drawn out subject of self debate. My take on this – I am ambitious, but in a unique way! I aspire to spread joy, touch people with the warmth of love, live each day as if it were my last… And trust me – I live my dream every single day! What more can I yearn for? Sweet dreams… :-)


Wednesday 12 November, 2008

Change… the ultimate truth!


I was reading a book ‘Not without my daughter’ which is a story of a woman’s struggle for freedom. It was a deeply compelling book… but as always my mind went galloping on another tangent altogether – Change!

Change is omnipotent… ubiquitous… all-encompassing! It touches each one of us in more than one way. Be it a variation, modification, revolution, conversion, amendment, transformation… It can be in any form, of varying magnitude… but it is the ultimate universal truth whether we accept it or not.

Sometimes (actually most of the time!) it frightens me… what if I wake up tomorrow morning to find my parents don’t love me anymore? What if my friends don’t need me anymore? What if my children start hating me? What if I become evil? What if I don’t have faith in my beliefs any more? What if I lose my self respect? What if I die tomorrow? What if… … …

As I fret over these apprehensions, my body and soul burn with anxiety! My ‘what ifs’ are infinite… I can spend a lifetime brooding over them and still have more to mull over! So why do I put myself through it? WHY??

We change, people around us change, circumstances change, perceptions change, beliefs change – the only thing common is ‘change’! When change is preordained, why all the fuss? What is, is… and what will be, will be! I don’t know what will happen tomorrow… but I know for a fact what I have today! Irrespective of the indeterminate future, I truly cherish and treasure my life TODAY!

I know what is today may or may not be there tomorrow. This realization keeps me prepared for what life throws at me in the future… but that does not stop me from relishing this very moment of my life which is so full of love and hope! Hope floats over the sea of change…yes... Hope floats! :)

Wednesday 30 July, 2008

Similar yet so different!


London – capital city of the United Kingdom… brimming with people from all across the globe. A city of hope and aspirations, of dreams and expectations. It resonates with the pain of the despondent, dances with the smile of a new born, swings to the sound of church bells ringing in a distance. So many people, so much energy, so much life… and yet it is surrounded by an aura of lonesomeness, a sense of distance even in close proximity, a feeling of isolation amidst a horde of people!

New Delhi – capital city of India… a city which belongs to the millionaire driving the latest sports car in CP as much as it belongs to the person singing ‘Chuski le lo’ at the ‘Lovely’ chuski center opposite India Gate. Stark contrasts, blatant differences and yet a sense of belonging… of empathy… of togetherness.

Two cities – so similar yet so different! Fathom this – peak time – a crowded train – one with grim people avoiding even a slight glance at their fellow passengers… looking either at the ceiling or at each other’s feet with eyes which seem to be engulfed in an unspoken grief. Not a word… not even something which qualifies as a smile – as if fighting the human urge to acknowledge each other’s existence.

Peak time – five and a half hours later – half way across the globe. A similar train… filled with people… some who are busy gaping at a pretty lass who just entered… or two strangers discussing similarities between Hillary vs Obama and Mayawati vs Manmohan Singh… a group of friends abusing each other as though they’re ready to tear each other apart! An aged lady insisting that a young mother with two infants take her seat…

Disparate people from different walks of life… forced into each other’s company during that one hour commute. It is amazing to experience how people can warm up to each other and reach out… create that one inch of extra space to accommodate one more person… or give unsolicited advice to a complete stranger!

Life here is a spicy mix of abundance in scarcity, hope in despair. I am free to plant a kiss on the cheek of a tiny toddler… to take her in my arms and tell her the story of how a crow flew to heaven to have a chat with God! Yes… it feels great to be back… away from the orderly life, from the onset on rain sans the sweet smell of moist soil, from the pressure to look good no matter how hollow your life maybe! I love my world of chaos, of unruly drivers, of pushing and pulling, of haggling and abusing… but more than anything else… I love my freedom of a ‘kiss’!!! :) Muaaaah!!

Sunday 6 January, 2008

A trek through life...


A warm sunny day

A long winding path

A song on my lips

A bag on my back

I tread on… alone


Where to? What for?

For the journey has no end

No purpose, no goal…

The path is the destination

And the destination is the path


And so I tread on… and on… and…


As I walk along the twists and turns

I unearth, I explore, I ponder

Each moment a learning

Every lesson a blessing

Which in my bag I gather.


At the end of the day

I say a little prayer

For those who care

And touch my life in their own special way.

God bless!!


As the sun shines down on the wood

I gather my memoirs

And wrap them with as much love as I could

The path is the destination

And the destination is the path


And so I tread on… and on… and… ALONE.

Friday 4 January, 2008

A tribute to my sweetheart… CALVIN!



Calvin - "To make a bad day worse, spend it wishing for the impossible."
JJ - I so know what you’re talking about here Calvin :-) But sometimes if you wish hard enough….

Calvin - "Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless."
JJ - Ah… bliss!

Calvin - "If you do the job badly enough, sometimes you don't get asked to do it again."
JJ - Tell me about it!!! Love to do it all the time… but work still manages to find me!!

Calvin - "Reality continues to ruin my life."
JJ - This one is my favourite!! Let me be in JJ world… no… don’t wake me up!! Noooooooooooo!!!

Calvin - "Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us."
JJ - LOL!! Yeah I guess that’s true… hmmm… but why not eliminate us lesser mortals! Hope they are not reading this!! :-)

Calvin - "I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point."
JJ - Actually they might become prophecies of great insight and divine knowledge. Well… I said might!!!

Calvin - "Childhood is short, maturity is forever."
JJ – Well… imagine mature kids!!!

Calvin - "In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks."
JJ – Well… if I ever enter politics… I have my agenda all set!!

Calvin - "People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world."
JJ – Ah… no wonder!! :-)

Calvin - "You know how Einstein got bad grades as a kid? Well, mine are even worse!"
JJ – Well Calvin guess what… mine are gonna be the worst ever!!!

Calvin - "I keep forgetting that rules are for little nice people."
JJ – Which I am NOT!!! :-) Well… not little or not nice… keep guessing!!!

Calvin - "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want."
JJ - I am already running on overtime!!

Calvin - "Reading goes faster if you don't sweat comprehension."
JJ - There… another mystery solved… How to read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in 1 hour!!

Calvin - "In my opinion, television validates existence."
JJ - This is Aditi’s topic for her thesis! :-)

Calvin - "The secret to happiness is short-term, stupid self-interest!"
JJ - Why do you think I am always so happy???

Calvin - "True friends are hard to come by...I need more money."
JJ - At this rate I am never gonna have any!!

Little Moments Of Joy


- by Barry Kingsley

Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. It was a cowboy’s life, a life for someone who wanted no boss. What I didn’t realize was that it was also a ministry.

Because I drove the night shift, my cab became a moving confessional. Passengers climbed in, sat behind me in total anonymity, and told me about their lives. I encountered people whose lives amazed me, ennobled me, made me laugh and weep.

But none touched me more than a woman I picked up late one August night.

I was responding to a call from a small brick fourplex in a quiet part of town. I assumed I was being sent to pick up some partiers, or someone who had just had a fight with a lover, or a worker heading to an early shift at some factory for the industrial part of town.

When I arrived at 2:30 a.m., the building was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window. Under these circumstances, many drivers would just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away. But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door and knocked.

“Just a minute,” answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940’s movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

“Would you carry my bag out to the car?” she said.

I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness.

“It’s nothing,” I told her. “I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated.”

“Oh, you’re such a good boy,” she said.

When we got in the cab, she gave me an address, then asked, “Could you drive through downtown?”

“It’s not the shortest way,” I answered quickly.

“Oh, I don’t mind,” she said. “I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.”

I looked in the rear view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. “I don’t have any family left,” she continued. “The doctor says I don’t have very long.”

I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. “What route would you like me to take?” I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, “I’m tired. Let’s go now.”

We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

“How much do I owe you?” she asked, reaching into her purse.

“Nothing,” I said.

“You have to make a living,” she answered.

“There are other passengers,” I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

“You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,” she said. “Thank you.”

I squeezed her hand, then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.

I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient at the end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life. We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware–beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

People may not remember exactly what you did, or what you said …but they will always remember how you made them feel.